KAYA- AN INSPIRATIONAL JOURNEY CONTINUATION OF BOOK 1, DISKARTE

KAYA

By Rhodegette Joyce Aldave Idul

Introduction

Kaya is a term in bisaya dialect means “You can do it!”. This is the word I often used when I am in the stage of life where I am going to share. I feel that this stage of my life was hardest crisis I encounter, but when I feel giving up, I tap my heart and say, “Kaya”!

This book contains of 10 chapters of story in my life. All of the setting was happened in Luzon Philippines. I stayed in Luzon specifically Manila for almost two years. Two years of finding my place without any connections at all.

I found that sharing my experience will help me to give courage to those who felt hopeless in this life. Also this book will make sense so much more as this is the continuation of my first book.

As always, I am not adding stories in this book so you will feel interested about me. This book is just about my journey and how I let the world educate me in such a way wherever I am, this stage and stories can still inspire me in my downfall days.

I wish I will inspire you somehow. After every chapter, I ask you to stay quiet and imagine your life what have you encountered that can connect to what you just read. Tap your heart and say, Kaya.

I am always your friend and I will always love you,

Jet

Chapter 1 - Stalker

I landed in Manila safely, I went out to the airport, smell the air and told myself- this is my new life, Kaya!

Right after that moment, I decided to walk to the nearest church called Baclaran church. After I prayed and fueling my hope to the new journey I am taking, a guy keep following me and bothering me. I set a time that if this guy will not stop bothering me I will use him by asking if I can stay in his place. This time I was surely in crisis but I never drop my integrity to not follow what is right and good for me.

Those times that this guy keep bothering me, I keep rejecting him like, If you selling insurance I am not interested, I don’t even know where will I go until I told him my situation. Then this guy bring me to one of the famous food place called Jolibee. I knew that nothing is free but I still eat and hoping that he won’t ask me for sex as the payment. I keep thinking positive besides my mind and guts are already arguing. I was hungry and keep talking to him without directing to anything sexual, I focus myself to get what I want which is a place to stay at that night before I will end myself in a street sleeping, which I cannot imagine.

I only have a shoulder bag with me so in any case I knew I will run if I have to. The guy offer me to stay to his mistress. He bring me to Antipolo where this woman lives with her children. Antipolo travel will take more than 4 hours especially if there is a traffic jam. I go with him and arrived before dawn to his woman house.

This place is a mountain, colder temperature with full of houses. He then introduced me as a niece from the south. He need to say I am from south because I have a different accent and hardly to communicate with them straight without mixing my language and English.

I sleep on the floor with the kids with some thin blanket and towel and they were across with me covered with a thin curtain. I hear everything that night and it was my first time to hear those sounds at night in my life.

I woke up and his woman offered me a coffee whilst I was looking to the kids. In my mind I questioned, how come this woman brings a life in this world and offered this kind of life to these kids. In that moment, I was motivated more to be self sufficient and never go to any relationship and having kids if I cannot give the life I wanted to have them.

A friend of mine called me at that day and he said I will go to meet his friend to hand me some cash that at least I can have a month to stay before he will come to Manila for his modeling career.

I traveled and met his friend and at that day I found a room for myself in a family house where his son stayed there as a student and one helper.

In that time where I have bed, an air conditioned room, a private bathroom for a whole month in a secluded property where all rich students stayed, I feel that My God of Universe I believe in never abandoned me. Yes I may suffer a night but it feels more to appreciate it when I have my place. I tap my heart again in front of the mirror and said, I told you Jet, Kaya uy! Ikaw pa! (You can do it because it is you!) then I see my genuine smile in front of the mirror that my inner self agrees to the words I just utter.

Chapter 2

My meal everyday

Since I got myself a place I work hard in looking a job by selling some products like soap, lotion to sustain my daily expenses and I only eat once a day.

I started my day going to church, pray to bless my day, sell my products and get a lunch as my one meal per day- A cup of rice and free soup.

I knew that I cant eat a lot because I do not have any job yet and selling is not always good everyday so I have to live as low as possible so I can survived.

The vendor asked me why I never get any viand, I then said that I can only afford a cup of rice and I am already grateful for it than to have nothing. This old woman who own the small restaurant offered me food, I looked at her with a surprised face and told her thank you but I will pay by washing the dishes.

I did washed the dishes that are available on that sink, since then I became close to them and wash dishes in exchange for my meal.

After I get a real job, I came back there and buy the famous cake and give them thanks.

When you are honest, even if you do not say it- others who have a good heart or who can experience what you have been through no need to hear you out, they will automatically offer their help. In that time I feel hopeful not only in life but to not giving up that people who were strangers at first gave me hope in the world I think there was no hope.

The Kaya that I believe in became more deeper to feel right at that moment.

Chapter 3

A proposal

It was hard to find a job at that moment as I have a fake Identity card and no document that can prove to my identity. I only rely to myself for everyday to survive. If I don’t sell then that means my day was a waste day.

To fuel my Kaya spirit, I always started my day by going to a church, kneeling down and ask to bless my day.

One day when I am on my way out to the church, right next to the door was a disabled man asking for money. He asked me money and so I responded him that I do not have and I am going to sell some soap door to door. He then replied, that I can be his wife living with him under the bridge and ask money everyday. I looked back to the cross and said, Lord, I do not care if I will not get married but this offer in front of is not the life that I wanted. Then I looked back to this guy and said, I am sorry but the life you have is not the life I wish to have and I walked away.

It wasn’t the first proposal I have actually. The first one was when I was 17 years old as an engineering student where a young man whose family is famous of owning land properties.

A throwback story,

This young man saw me when I bought something in the store. The vendor is my friend so this young man asked my number to my friend. I was not interested to be in relationship because I need to focus to my study but this guy keep coming to the house where only my sister and I were living as that was the house close to the University we studied. Until one day I was in my sports class my sister called me, she told me that the whole family of that young man are now in our house asking her where I am and to have an arrange wedding. My sister told me over the phone that in order for their son to not always visits me, they asked my sister that I will stay in their house and they will provide everything including my school fees. As I was 17 years old at that time, they said they can wait the marriage whenever we are ready.

I laughed after I heard that from my sister and told her to refused down the offer and then my sister told me to not come home and she will deal all of them. I came home late when my sister told me that I can come home and right after I was in the gate our neighbor asked me what was my relationship to this family as the whole family visits in our home, this time I lied and said, oh they are family friends like feels a family. I heard some rumors from some neighbors teasing that I am dating this guy, I looked back at them and said- wow! I wish I can date him, that will be very nice and my future will be secured, but I don’t think its possible, you want me to asked him if his interested to any female in your family? I smiled and went inside in our home.

My sister saw me, pulled my hair with an excited emotion, slap me everywhere - again in excited emotion. I asked her what did she said that makes them go, she said, oh my sister is not really interested to your son. She wants to be an engineer and wants to focus to her study. Then my sister asked me that if I say yes then my future is secured, I replied “ Then life is not exciting anymore if that will be”.

My sister found me cold after that and I asked her to call it a day as I have to draw some plates for my studies. On that weekend I went to where my parents live and I got a message that this young man was in front of our rest house with a teddy bear and balloons, I then replied, that is nice but I am in my parents home also I can buy those if I wanted, you are a nice young man but I want to create the life that I work hard not just because it is give in front of me. Then I blocked him.

I cut people when I know I am not interested to create a future with, to stop the hope.

I actually met him again but he was in his motorbike, he sent me facebook friend request, I accepted and we communicate again. He then said he has a wife and a baby now. I congratulate him and that was the last time I spoke with him. I never regretted to refused the offer down, aside I don’t want a ready made future, I also do not know what love and relationship in that age. For me answering math problems in every book and buy new book again to solve problems is what makes me happy. So if I say yes, I am not sure if I will be happier of what I have now.

Since then I believe I am responsible of my life. Since then I believe that I can create my own life of how I wanted it, Kaya.

Chapter 4

7 eleven opportunities

My first 7 Eleven opportunity or blessing was when I was kicked out to the house I stayed. The house where I get a room for a whole month. I cannot pay to extend my stay so I was kicked out. I was in the 7 Eleven waiting my next move to do, my problem to solve was where will I sleep before the night will come. I only knew hotels I have no idea that there are hostels.

I was sitting in front of the 7 eleven where another seller found me, he asked me what am I doing there. I then said I am thinking where to sleep as I was kicked out. He then offered that he knew someone who is gay with a house that I can stay. He then send me there and when I got there, this man or gay let me sat in a living room in front of him and asked my personal information. Surely he is asking me questions to know my background if he can trust me.

He asked my full name and I said Rhodegette Joyce Aldave Idul. He then looked surprised and asked me what was the Aldave stands for. I said that the last name from my mother. He then followed to asked me if I know Susan Aldave. I looked surprised to him and asked him to describe the Susan Aldave he knew.

Susan Aldave is my grandmother, a sister of my real grandfather which it was his best friend who adopted him back then in a mining town. Goosebumps, yes I feel that where all my hairs are all up, questioning what percentage it can be in this coincidence. I called my mom and asked a number of my grandmother. Actually they lost contact and when I spoke to my grandma and handed my phone to him, I can see the moment that I cannot explain.

I never stayed there longer as there was one day his guy friend almost raped me. I woke up and he almost jump on me naked. Also there are family that I became close who always stole my money and when I said I can’t find my money, they will reply that they took it because they were hungry. If you are wondering how come many people in that house, actually his house that he offered wasn’t his house as he is not always there, he let me stay to a house with his friend where she got 3 daughters so I won’t feel that lonely.

My second 7 eleven opportunity was I was there again after I went to church then a black woman with her braids was in front of me. I found the braids so cool and at that time I may be poor but I have my digital camera fiji. I asked her if I can take a picture of her hair as a future reference and she won’t be worry because I will never post it to any social medias, also that time I am not interested in social media.

After I took a picture of her hair, she looked back and ask me like this, “Do you want a job?”. At that time I am selling soap and do a tutorial of calculus to a student who is studying engineering. It is not that I am so poor but I am still not comfortable, so when she asked I replied that as long as it is legal and moral, I am in. Then, she told me to wait an hour as she will have a dinner with her boyfriend and she will come back and introduced me to work.

She came back and I tap my head while saying inside of my mind, it is night and dark, dodgy road.. Kaya!Kaya!

My kaya that time is in crisis.

Chapter 5

My first job

The woman I come with that night gave me a job and that was my first job.

I was walking with her in a dodgy dark street. I feel weird but my guts tells me to still trust her. We arrived in a building where a gym full of barbells and went to an elevator where the door has a painting of a lover doing a dog style.

I hesitate to get inside but it seems I will not judge and see what the offer is. At that time, I already judge that the job she is offering is a prostitute. My mind automatically thinks what will I answer if she will ask the job offer.

When we came out from the elevator, I saw no filipinos and the light are color pink. My mind is talking back and forth but I stay still and focus where I can say my answer and leave.

A Danish woman with her wine then asked me questions as a job interview, “Are you open minded?”. I then replied, yes I am open minded but I only work to what is legal and moral. Then she replied,” Oh that is good, come back on Wednesday. And so I left after that.

At that time I sleep to my bisaya friends whom I just met in the 7 eleven. I told them what happened and thinking if I will come back on Wednesday.

I did come back that Wednesday, actually I was late being lost as it was dark when I went there. When I arrived there it was the woman I met in 7 eleven. I said what is my work, then she said to clean the living room and all cabinets, wash dishes and clean what are dirty in my eyes.

Because I try I found a first job without asking my credentials. I then asked if I can have a place to stay so I do not have to have a place to find outside and I even offer that she can deduct in my salary as I had an experience almost rape to the place I lived.

She then agreed and I have my space. It was a bed on the floor in the fan room with 16 beds with a bamboo rectangle so people cannot see me sleeping on that corner.

That was my job that questioned me a lot in y life from culture difference to religion and dreams/ goals. That is where I met a lot of people who are now my real friends. That is where I met Davi, Dominic, Liza, Liv and all not to mentioned nice people who gave me love and gave me hope that I can have a difference in this life.

My Kaya at that time feels relaxed for awhile until I  found another better job.

Chapter 6

I was accused

My job from a cleaner to receptionist was an amazing experience. I enjoy cleaning toilets from singing to dancing with the bubbles until a guy knock the door and asked me if I was okay. He was the one that suggested to my boss that I am better to work there as a receptionist. People found I was good in communication that I never expected I do have such talent. People/ guests keep coming back and market the hostel because Jet is there. I received a lot of gifts from chocolates to stuff and even sometimes money. That was the time I felt I have a value in this world.

To give you an idea, my first Thailand, Indonesia, Mlalaysia, and Singapore trip was all paid from a guest in my first job. He paid everything for him to accompany him traveling as his alone and his girlfriend will follow after a week because of her girlfriends work. Of course I also asked his girlfriend and it all went work out after all.

One day I was accused that I took a cheap tablet from guest. I remember that the guy who accused me even asked me to take photo and I even suggested my camera since the quality of photo from his tablet was not good.

I remember he told me that he can track his tablet and we were 5 people who went to the suspect place where his tablet was there. I was stupid to go there and some guests come with me because they knew it was not me. When I come back the woman who hired me fired me that day.

I do not know where to go, I cried and reminded myself how I landed in a place I have no anyone and said Kaya with a deep breathe.

Chapter 7

I found some truth

The danish woman who interviewed me resigned before I had that accused actually offered me her place for 3 days before she move to another place. I stayed there while looking for a job.

I found right away a job that needs me to do medical process. It was my first time filming me when a woman put that injection to get some blood test. Hi to those who hates needles. I get another interview from a recommendation from another staff I was with in that hostel.

That staff actually offered me a rent place to stay that ending me up to know the truth that everything was scripted. I found that it was all play to kick me out and that staff is part of it and he even steal money and stuff from that hostel.

Sometimes you cannot trust an angel face and approach, it gives me that lesson. It gives me an idea to not give up trust but never forget that in this world those who are taking advantage are still here on this earth.

From that on, I cut them off in my life. The danish woman gave me a job in a solar company as an outbound call center agent, I found another place and move on.

You have to say No to those no longer serves you a better person. I used to fell and stand up again, alone - Kaya!

Chapter 8

Moonlighting

Moonlighting is the term where a person has another job. Actually in the Philippines it is illegal especially that you are working two jobs in the same industry. I work from 8 am to 5pm and another company same work from 11pm to 7 am. The reason that it is illegal because you may spill some strategies of the company from company A to Company B. The reason I choose to stay in that job because I want to afford to have a place next to where the company is located that I want to keep.

After I paid my rent I resigned to my 8 am to 5pm company and focus to the company from 11 pm to 7 am.

The place I rented was 20 steps away from me so in that case it was worth to save transportation and traffic jams. I still remember when I have two jobs , I fell asleep in a jeep and find another jeep again going back as I miss it out the place I should drop because I was sleeping.

Usually training takes 3 months to  be on floor, in my case I was only 3 days in the training and on the floor. So far I was doing great of my job, and most of the time part of top HPC. That company is actually based in California USA and we are the only outbound outside in the US with 30 ish agents.

Remember the Danish woman who interviewed? She was my general management in that company. She taught me to be vigilant and not super attach to people who does not serves me a better person. I call her mommy Liv until now. Every break time I ony go to her office, talk to her and eat with her. She taught me how not be a crying Jit as she saw me many times those tears fell and she always gave me that warmth hug.

It was good to have someone who will hug you and still believes in you when you are used to gather yourself alone.

Mommy Liv level up my Kaya and trust to another level. Thank you Mommy Liv! I love you!

Chapter 9

I afford food and place to stay, I finally afford to have a holiday

I believe that you cannot have everything at the same time, everything will fall into a right place and a right time. When I got my work after starting from scratches I begin to have place, work, afford food and have friends.

I visited Subic by myself and Sagada and Baguio with Ate Liza, when someone serves me food I thank that person because I a;ways feel good when someone say Thank you after I gave my service.

When you experience life that educate you, you won’t forget it and you became naturally kind to all around you. The Universe will always check if you are worth it to all your dreams. The Universe will test you many times right to the rock bottom that no one can believe you still stay and keep moving forward in this life. In all time, never forget what you learn, keep kaya and keep that feet on the ground!

Chapter 10

I visits to my family before I went on my first out of the country trip

One time I decided to visit my family, I saw my mom crying when she saw me I was approaching home. When she gave me a hug, I told her without any plan at all to say this, “Do not cry I am not even in other country yet”.

After a month I visit them I was able to visit Vietnam, my first out of a country in my life. It was only a couple of days then I went to Cambodia.

I was in Cambodia going 3 months. I was there to work, I work as a manager in the morning and waitress at night.

I learned to drink and smoke and spend my money as if there was no tomorrow, until one day I found myself on the next morning sick, ran in the hospital and I was dehydrated as no water in my body as I keep drinking beer and in couple of days was a nightmare.

I feel sick and sad and keep dreaming weird, I woke up one day dreaming my grandma- bought a ticket for the next morning and come back home.

I became a wild monster, uncontrollable, curious and tried a bad life until the Universe send me back home. The Universe surely wanted me to learn something.

I studied back and took care my grandma until she died. Kaya bring me somewhere before, soon I will have that Kaya again and go further. .